RESPONSIBILITY

Working with the public, you view all sorts of situations. It is curious to watch parents and their children, and you wonder what some of them are thinking? Are they thinking? Parents are responsible for assuring that their children become decent members of society. That should be their priority. It is as important as making sure they sleep and eat enough to be healthy. Children's lives and self worth are enriched if they receive positive feedback from everyone around them. No one wants to be bothered with a loud, selfish, obnoxious brat, no matter if they are 2 or 22 or 32. The older the "brat" becomes, the fewer friends they will have. Why would a parent enable such destructive behavior in their own child? How desperate and lonely and depressing the outlook must be for an adult, who has not been taught and encouraged to become a productive member of society. And it is easier to become that productive member of society as a child grows up. Sadly some people live their entire life being miserable and making everyone around them miserable. Only when their enabler dies, must they then deal with life, alone and unprepared. A harsh lesson! It is cruel to allow and foster actions and attitudes in our children, which are unwholesome. Society tries to keep children from physical abuse, but who protects them from emotional abuse. When a parent does not fulfill their responsibility to quide and teach and enrich their children's lives but allow them to grow into shallow, selfish adults, that is emotional abuse.

What a pleasure it is to see a family that respects and encourages each other. The children are cheerful and polite. And they learn the public appreciates their good behavior. And life will be easier for those children as they mature. Each new experience builds on the previous one giving them a broader outlook and a better perspective of what life can become. These are the children who will grow into responsible adults, caring first for themselves and then enriching their society, and unfortunately having to provide for the "brats", who were encouraged( by their loving?? parents) in their bad behavior.

CHANGE

A difficult process for all of us, is to make our peace with change. No matter what aspect : our personal life, our community, our culture, our country, we are comfortable in the status quo, and even with the promise of the "new" being better-it still concerns us. But it cannot be stopped, but hopefully can be altered for a better fit. Sometimes it is us and our outlook, which must undergo that alteration.

In retrospect, some things, which were devastating at the time turned out to be for the best. It is easier to understand the past, when it is viewed full circle as history, than while we are trying to live through it in the here and now.

It is how we respond and get involved, learning and growing, that shapes our lives and the constant change we are exposed to. Bracing our feet and shaking our head NO doesn't work. Change comes regardless of our resistance.

Growing old is one example. It happens to one and all and is better than the alternative! And if age has taught us nothing else, we should realize how precious our time is and not waste a moment of it in negative thoughts and/or actions.

The worst of situations can be made more tolerable, if we have a positive outlook. To whine and fuss will only make us and all around us more miserable. If we can't fix it we must learn to deal with it, so we can move on.

Change-meet it head on, unafraid.

FRIENDSHIP

My friend is slipping away into the darkness of Alzheimer's. We met almost 40 years ago. She has lots of common sense and had a good work ethic. We've shared good and bad times, laughter and tears, and endless cups of tea and coffee in front of the fire. Between us, we could "fix" the World, if "they" would only pay attention! For many years we have kept in touch with letters, phone calls and semi annual visits, as miles separate us. We have marveled at our connection as we have been grateful. Our backgrounds are completely different, she is from a large family in East Texas, Southern Baptists and I have one sibling and am a farm gal from a Roman Catholic family. But we see only the best in each other and we "clicked". She is talented: an excellent seamstress, quilter, good cook, a gardener, and in her retirement years, she took up painting. And most of all, she is a wife of almost 60 years and a good Mother and Grandmother. A positive role model for all who have met her. We shared a love of reading and of sitting to watch a sunset or rainbow. We've watched our families grow and prayed our/their way through thick and thin. I am a better person for having known her. She is my best friend.

LETTERS

What a joy to open the mailbox and find a letter. Or even better, to find two letters! I quickly open them and read top to bottom, then I lay them aside, and later I sit down with a cup of tea and reread at my leisure. The letter stays on my desk and when I sit down to reply I read it once again. A short note is appreciated, but a 2 or 3 page letter is a true joy. How nice to read of our friends activities, their health, and how things are going for their families. We love Christmas letters. Some friends, we only hear from at the Holidays, and we are happy to read about their year and what has been happening in their lives. Phone calls are nice, but they are made at the caller's connivance. Email is wonderful for a quick note, but many use this modern technology to waste every one's time by merely filling up my mailbox with erroneous warnings of dire happenings or with foolish messages or pictures, forwarding them to me and everyone else in their address book. Hopefully, they wouldn't waste a stamp to mail this drivel, but they will fill up my in box with it. But they don't take the time to write us a "real" note.

We received a "thank you" note in today's mail. From a young man, who recently graduated from High School. He had the time to open our congratulation card and find the money enclosed and he took the time to sit down and write us a note. And we appreciated that. When I was very young, my Mother explained that when the time came that I was to busy to write a note of "thanks", that I should return gifts unopened, for I surely would NOT have time to open and use what was enclosed.

We send lots of picture postcards. We have several older friends and relatives, who live at a distance. We want them to know that they are often in our thoughts and prayers. So we search for the "scenic and the silly" area postcards and we write a brief note and send them off. It only takes a few minutes to keep in touch.

My family knows I can always use a box of pretty note cards or stationary. A book of stamps, or a new pen, they all will get used sooner or later, so it is easy to shop for me.

There are cards for most major Holidays. Isn't everyone Irish on St. Pat's day? What better way to acknowledge our gratitude for some one's friendship than to send them a card at Thanksgiving. Valentine's Day, Easter, and of course, New Year's and Christmas, birthdays or Anniversaries, there are cards for every occasion, jot a note and you'll put an envelope of cheer in some one's mailbox. And of all the cards and letters we write, none are more important or appreciated than the ones sent to someone coping with serious illness or struggling with the death of a loved one.

I must go and get busy at my desk!