NEW LIFE

There is a new baby girl in town today. We are relieved the wait is over and all went well. She has a big sister at home, such a nice young family. They give us hope for the future. And GIRLS-- in our family the girls were and are few and far between, so it is fun to be able to buy dresses, barrets, ribbons, and dolls for a change.

RESPONSIBILITY

Working with the public, you view all sorts of situations. It is curious to watch parents and their children, and you wonder what some of them are thinking? Are they thinking? Parents are responsible for assuring that their children become decent members of society. That should be their priority. It is as important as making sure they sleep and eat enough to be healthy. Children's lives and self worth are enriched if they receive positive feedback from everyone around them. No one wants to be bothered with a loud, selfish, obnoxious brat, no matter if they are 2 or 22 or 32. The older the "brat" becomes, the fewer friends they will have. Why would a parent enable such destructive behavior in their own child? How desperate and lonely and depressing the outlook must be for an adult, who has not been taught and encouraged to become a productive member of society. And it is easier to become that productive member of society as a child grows up. Sadly some people live their entire life being miserable and making everyone around them miserable. Only when their enabler dies, must they then deal with life, alone and unprepared. A harsh lesson! It is cruel to allow and foster actions and attitudes in our children, which are unwholesome. Society tries to keep children from physical abuse, but who protects them from emotional abuse. When a parent does not fulfill their responsibility to quide and teach and enrich their children's lives but allow them to grow into shallow, selfish adults, that is emotional abuse.

What a pleasure it is to see a family that respects and encourages each other. The children are cheerful and polite. And they learn the public appreciates their good behavior. And life will be easier for those children as they mature. Each new experience builds on the previous one giving them a broader outlook and a better perspective of what life can become. These are the children who will grow into responsible adults, caring first for themselves and then enriching their society, and unfortunately having to provide for the "brats", who were encouraged( by their loving?? parents) in their bad behavior.

CHANGE

A difficult process for all of us, is to make our peace with change. No matter what aspect : our personal life, our community, our culture, our country, we are comfortable in the status quo, and even with the promise of the "new" being better-it still concerns us. But it cannot be stopped, but hopefully can be altered for a better fit. Sometimes it is us and our outlook, which must undergo that alteration.

In retrospect, some things, which were devastating at the time turned out to be for the best. It is easier to understand the past, when it is viewed full circle as history, than while we are trying to live through it in the here and now.

It is how we respond and get involved, learning and growing, that shapes our lives and the constant change we are exposed to. Bracing our feet and shaking our head NO doesn't work. Change comes regardless of our resistance.

Growing old is one example. It happens to one and all and is better than the alternative! And if age has taught us nothing else, we should realize how precious our time is and not waste a moment of it in negative thoughts and/or actions.

The worst of situations can be made more tolerable, if we have a positive outlook. To whine and fuss will only make us and all around us more miserable. If we can't fix it we must learn to deal with it, so we can move on.

Change-meet it head on, unafraid.

FRIENDSHIP

My friend is slipping away into the darkness of Alzheimer's. We met almost 40 years ago. She has lots of common sense and had a good work ethic. We've shared good and bad times, laughter and tears, and endless cups of tea and coffee in front of the fire. Between us, we could "fix" the World, if "they" would only pay attention! For many years we have kept in touch with letters, phone calls and semi annual visits, as miles separate us. We have marveled at our connection as we have been grateful. Our backgrounds are completely different, she is from a large family in East Texas, Southern Baptists and I have one sibling and am a farm gal from a Roman Catholic family. But we see only the best in each other and we "clicked". She is talented: an excellent seamstress, quilter, good cook, a gardener, and in her retirement years, she took up painting. And most of all, she is a wife of almost 60 years and a good Mother and Grandmother. A positive role model for all who have met her. We shared a love of reading and of sitting to watch a sunset or rainbow. We've watched our families grow and prayed our/their way through thick and thin. I am a better person for having known her. She is my best friend.

LETTERS

What a joy to open the mailbox and find a letter. Or even better, to find two letters! I quickly open them and read top to bottom, then I lay them aside, and later I sit down with a cup of tea and reread at my leisure. The letter stays on my desk and when I sit down to reply I read it once again. A short note is appreciated, but a 2 or 3 page letter is a true joy. How nice to read of our friends activities, their health, and how things are going for their families. We love Christmas letters. Some friends, we only hear from at the Holidays, and we are happy to read about their year and what has been happening in their lives. Phone calls are nice, but they are made at the caller's connivance. Email is wonderful for a quick note, but many use this modern technology to waste every one's time by merely filling up my mailbox with erroneous warnings of dire happenings or with foolish messages or pictures, forwarding them to me and everyone else in their address book. Hopefully, they wouldn't waste a stamp to mail this drivel, but they will fill up my in box with it. But they don't take the time to write us a "real" note.

We received a "thank you" note in today's mail. From a young man, who recently graduated from High School. He had the time to open our congratulation card and find the money enclosed and he took the time to sit down and write us a note. And we appreciated that. When I was very young, my Mother explained that when the time came that I was to busy to write a note of "thanks", that I should return gifts unopened, for I surely would NOT have time to open and use what was enclosed.

We send lots of picture postcards. We have several older friends and relatives, who live at a distance. We want them to know that they are often in our thoughts and prayers. So we search for the "scenic and the silly" area postcards and we write a brief note and send them off. It only takes a few minutes to keep in touch.

My family knows I can always use a box of pretty note cards or stationary. A book of stamps, or a new pen, they all will get used sooner or later, so it is easy to shop for me.

There are cards for most major Holidays. Isn't everyone Irish on St. Pat's day? What better way to acknowledge our gratitude for some one's friendship than to send them a card at Thanksgiving. Valentine's Day, Easter, and of course, New Year's and Christmas, birthdays or Anniversaries, there are cards for every occasion, jot a note and you'll put an envelope of cheer in some one's mailbox. And of all the cards and letters we write, none are more important or appreciated than the ones sent to someone coping with serious illness or struggling with the death of a loved one.

I must go and get busy at my desk!

Family

Families are fun and sometimes funny! "They" say "You may chose your friends, but you have to learn to live with your family". Doing family history, it becomes evident that not only physical features, but personalities are passed down and around. And of course, the ideas, morals, values, and prejudices have their impact, as well. We should accept the idea that we are all part of the family of mankind. If we made an effort to overlook the differences perceived in our neighbor and looked for the goodness, we could achieve more harmony. We all become a product of our experiences. Good or bad, they influence us. We need to reflect and try to understand, not only our response, but also give some thought to why the other person chose such an action. And poor choices by a single person should not condemn any one else except them, not the rest of their family, ethnic group, or their church family.

One of the many things we must do for our children, is teach them tolerance. To pass on our prejudices and hatred is truly ignorant and sinful.

GIFTS

The gift of :

listening
affection
laughter
compliment
favor
solitude
cheerful disposition
a note of love or appreciation

The best gifts are priceless and cost little!

RIPPLES

Watch a pebble tossed into water-

The ripples spread out and finally fade.

Our life is like the quiet pool.

Our first responsibility is to ourselves.(the center)

Our spouse comes next.

Our children, our parents, siblings, & family.

Our friends & neighbors-

Our fellow townsmen-

For most of us, our time, ability, and finances will seldom reach out much further than this. We can never be of service to others, if we do not take good care of our own health and well being first. Then the priorities!My few discretionary dollars will go further and aid more people, if they are spent as close to my home as possible and go thru as few hands and bureaucracies as absolutely necessary. Yes, I am sure there are needs, worthy needs, around our State, around our Rocky Mountain area, and in our country. And most surely in other spots around our World. But if we each care for the area where we reside, surely more of the dollars would arrive at the needed spot, and not be spent (lost) in the paperwork & expenses, or be in danger of being mishandled. Isn't that what we all strive for? To do as much good as is possible. To use our money wisely and care for those nearby, should not diminish our charity, but be seen as a thoughtful and planned use of our limited resources. In a perfect world, no child would be hungry or cold. Our limited funds will feed and warm more children, if they are spent closer to home. More bang for the buck!

HURRY!

What is to be gained by rushing through each day. It is quicker and easier to do something correctly the first time, than to redo it it,when the problem is discovered, and no one else has been inconvenienced by our mistake. Taking time to think, plan and review decisions and actions result in better choices, saving time, effort, money, or heartache. What wonderful things do we accomplish with the few extra minutes we have saved by our hastiness?

On the highway, someone passes you going well over the posted speed limit. Over the next hill, you find them parked along the side of the road, discussing their poor choice with a Wyoming Highway patrolman. Or even sadder, you see them in the midst of a traffic accident.

We find the time to do what we want.

Do we listen to our excuses: as we say out loud, "I didn't have time to call you, visit you, write a note, do what I had promised to do, etc....".

If we made time to walk and exercise, perhaps we could lower our blood pressure. If we planned our days a bit, and gave our schedule some thought, perhaps we could fulfill our obligations and still do some of the things we would enjoy doing. When asked to make a commitment, perhaps we should pause and think before agreeing to ONE more chore. Priorities!

Time is money. Time is precious. Do we plan and use our few hours wisely? If we knew that this was to be our last day on Earth, how would we revise our schedule?

Perhaps it is our last day!

Perhaps we should review our choices!

ETHICS

My world is BLACK and WHITE.

NO, there is no gray.

Gray is a way of saying "But I WANT to do the wrong thing!"

Something is either right or it is wrong. And doing the wrong thing secretively makes it worse, if that is possible. If you must hide what you are doing, you are already admitting to yourself that this is a wrong.

Choices!

We make many choices each day, and we and our family, friends, and coworkers are affected by them. We are and should be held responsible for them, good choices or poor choices.

OPINIONS #2

The first post was about opinions.

Common sense, ethics, priorities--

such "old fashioned" ideas.

Money or the lack there of--a hot topic, but does anyone sit down with a paper and pencil and really look at their monetary situation? How many have a budget? How many know the amount of interest they pay each month (on their debt)? Do they figure out how much that new car, new item of clothing, or that purchase made on a whim, will really cost. How many hours will they need to work to pay the bill? Do they really need or want it to spend that much of their life to pay for it?

Common sense 101--perhaps if NOT taught at home, should become a required class for our high schools?

Today's view

Fern leafed peonies blooming in profusion in our yard. A unique addition to my husband's beautiful yard. Many plants of various sizes all came originally from two plants, one from my Father's yard and one from my husband's Mother's yard. So as we walk through our flowers beds, we are reminded of our parents. The blooms only last a few days, but the plants will remain green all summer. Summer is brief in our climate, so we sit outside as much as possible and enjoy our peaceful surroundings.

MEMORIAL DAY WEEKEND

We are a distance from the graves of most of our family. We visit their final resting places, when we are in that area. On this weekend, and other times thru the year, we care for the graves of friends here in our home town. Our local cemetery, WILLOW GROVE is well cared for. It has large old cottonwood trees and all sorts of newer trees. The stones are kept in good repair and many are decorated all year long. Lilacs and peonies bloom next to silk and plastic. Flags fly at the graves of those who served our country. And on a quiet morning you may see deer or antelope or a shy cottontail. Some sites have wrought iron or cement benches, where visitors may pause and remember happier days. The view of the Big Horn Mountains is breathtaking against a bright blue Wyoming sky.

WILLOW GROVE was established over 100 years ago. Near the entrance, it has a small POTTER'S FIELD, with 11 (early) graves: 9 men, 1 woman and 1 child. For many years the graves were unmarked, The local ROTARY CLUB installed a fence years ago. Recently, the local Historical Society replaced the wire fence with a pole fence. A local woodcarver, my husband, carved a sign to hang over the entry. Metal markers were purchased and set in cement bases and placed at the graves. Each year the Society places flowers at the graves. Just one visible aspect of the generous, caring community in which we live.

Over 20 years ago, we purchased a lot at WILLOW GROVE. And 2 years ago, we purchased a headstone and had it installed. One less thing for our son to do after our deaths. Last summer, we planted a tree near by.

A special time for reflecting and remembering those, who are no longer with us. Reminding us to get in touch with family and friends. Reminding us how precious life is and how fleeting. Don't put off till tomorrow, do it today, tomorrow may not come. Acknowledging that sadness should only be for our own loss. To be free of the concerns and suffering of life, means our loved ones are truly resting in peace.

AWARENESS

It has been a difficult few weeks in our small community. Several serious accidents and several with serious illness. We pause a moment and realise we take our good health and good fortune for granted. We add our prayers to the many being said, that those afflicted may have courage and strength and ease to their sufferings.

A young couple, friends of our children, are hurting. Their youngest son, only 22, was killed last weekend, his older brother was seriously injured just a few weeks ago. Their lives are forever changed. Their pain will never cease. Our hearts ache for them and we pray unceasingly that they may find peace and be comforted.

When we are envious, we always choose to look at the rich and healthy and ask "Why can't we be like them?". We never question our lot in life, when viewing the poor, the ill, and the aged.

MAY DAY

May baskets, made filled and left quietly at someone's doorstep. Ring the doorbell and runaway! Such dear memories from our youth! Violets and dandelions picked in the yard and road ditches, but presented with love were as beautiful as the most perfect rose. It truly is the thought which counts.

Now we have the local florist deliver fresh flowers to friends. We love fresh flowers and they often grace our living space. We send them to friends and family often, Holidays, birthdays, or just because, and always on May Day. A way to say "We are thinking of you" or "Thanks". Men, once they get over the shock of someone actually sending THEM flowers, enjoy a bouquet. So we make a list and say a prayer as we add names.

Friends are the flowers in our lives.

FLEXABILITY

Two day with temperatures in the 70s, then this morning, we awake to a winter wonderland! Several inches of snow and it is still falling. Our World is fresh and white. Luckily our trees have not fully leafed out, so there should be little damage. But the boots, which had been put away, must be retrieved and worn today. And a coat and mittens will be needed as well. The moisture will allow the grass to be very green, once it is again visible. Weather and life, they change from day to day, moment to moment. We need to take it as it comes and refrain from complaining. There is always a silver lining to every cloud if we are patient and wait for it to be discovered. Illness and accidents have brought pain and heartache to several in our community this week, reminding us to reserve our complaints for the truly important woes. So we view the snow as needed moisture, even though it needs to be shoveled or swept. And we say a prayer in gratitude that we are able to do so, even as we pray for those who are incapacitated.

QUIET

We have become a noisy society. Why? Are we really listening or is it just a habit? Noise is stressful and distracting. Seems there is always something noisy in the background of our lives. Distractions result in errors. Noise is just another type of rudeness! The TV or radio, add to the usual outside noise of traffic and construction. My husband is losing his hearing, and background noise just adds to his difficulties. We choose restaurants that are quieter and then choose a table away from the speakers, if possible. We ask for a table in a corner and he sits with his back to the wall. We don't make return visits to homes, where the TV is always on, it is difficult to carry on a conversation with the background noise. Quiet times let our minds wander and become refreshed. We become aware of the peaceful noise of nature, Spring has brought a new group of birds to the feeders in our yard, and their songs are joyful. We purchased a fountain for our patio last summer, and are anxious for summer, so it can add its soothing water fall noise to our environment. Quiet lets us mull over things in our mind and hopefully find solutions. Quiet lets us think and remember and say a prayer.

SPRING CLEANING

Sunshine and soft breezes-time to open the windows and let in some fresh air. Walk thru the house and make note of what needs to be polished and set to rights. Isn't that an old fashioned phrase "set to rights"? Sparkling windows and glowing wood surfaces will set the stage for a new season. We will put away the winter decor and replace it with clear glass and fresh flowers. Time to do some entertaining, now that storms and bad roads will not be in the equation. A simple meal shared is more tasty than a feast eaten alone. We use the best dishes and cloth napkins, a pretty setting makes any meal taste better.

Many objects have memories attached. So cleaning and polishing isn't a chore but a stroll down Memory Lane. We pray as we polish. And smile to our self as we pass an object and think of its former owner.

Time to sweep the cobwebs and grime from our hearts and minds as well. The entire World will seem brighter if we view it with a fresh perspective. Time to forget and get on with life. Yesterday is gone and cannot be fixed. Today is here ahead of us , to enjoy and try to use wisely, to do our jobs to the best of our ability, to help our friends and family and the strangers we will meet as we go about our day. Some days we perform better than other days, but we try not to become discouraged by our failures.

Tomorrow will be better!

Hope springs eternal-

We shouldn't settle for less!

OLDER

Another birthday! My Mother often said "Never regret growing older, many are denied the privilege." I am now several years older than she was at her death. So I try to accept the wrinkles and the gray hair and am grateful for my good health. Dave, a dear friend of my husband's, always told us "Wrinkles, gray hair or NO hair--they don't hurt! Only worry about things that cause pain." Each day is a gift, to enjoy and share. They do seem to pass quicker than they use to. So we need to write a note to a dear friend or relative, enjoy a cup of tea, read a good book, say a prayer, or just sit in the sun and do nothing. We should not waste a moment. Resentment, anger, & all negative thoughts are a waste of precious time. Try to forgive, insist on forgetting. Hopefully we learn from the past, to ensure a better, more pleasant future. Not "some" day, but today! Happy Birthday to me! Happy Year to come!

SPRING

Sunshine and mild breezes, then snow and chill. Wyoming seasons seem to mix, one with another, to keep us guessing. What should we wear, always a sweater or jacket close at hand. Even the hottest day may be followed by a chilly evening, once the sun sets. We are tempted to dig in the dirt and get busy and plant something, for Spring is surely just around the corner. Dust billows from our streets, no longer slick with winter's ice & snow. A nice rain would wash away the grime of the season past. Each season is unique, with its own good and bad aspects. So we try not to grumble, but persevere, knowing this to shall pass. No boredom, wait 24 hours and it will all change! Listen to the birds sing. Watch for the jonquils and tulips, they are peeking thru. Soon the lilacs will bloom and a walk thru our town will full of fragrance! Take delight in your surroundings, take time to smell the roses (or the lilacs). Spring, a new beginning, once again.

Answers?

Many years ago, I was discouraged.
I had prayed and prayed.
And my prayers had not been answered.
Upon hearing my lament,my husband ask
"Have you considered the answer was NO?"


Oh!!! That is an answere, isn't it?

Caring

The daughter of a friend is seriously ill.

We don't wait for a "free" moment
to say a prayer for her. Each time
we think of her, that thought becomes
our plea.

"Give her strength, courage, and peace."

RESPONSIBILITY

An old fashioned idea? Not my fault! Somebody (else) ought to do something! We want to do what ever we want to do and also NOT do what we don't want to do. Where does ethics come into the equation? We are ENTITLED!

Wait? Of course not, we want it now, and we don't want to have to work very hard to obtain it. Society or the government or someone (other than me) ought to provide_____ (fill in the blank)! Everything has a price and someone has to pay. Does the thought process ever reach that far? Where is the money coming from?

An honest wage for an honest day's work. Pay as you go. Take pride in your work. Be responsible for your actions or your inactivity. Such old fashioned ideas. And we wonder why our society has problems!

WHY?

Our elderly and our children, two groups who should be cherished and loved and well cared for. Yet, our culture seems to warehouse many of them in the poorest conditions and pay minimum wages to the people hired to care for them. And we "wonder" why there is neglect and abuse? What is the rationale? What are we thinking? Are we thinking? What are our memories of those who touched our lives as children? Have we stopped to think about our future, when we can no longer care for ourselves? One would think that self preservation would push us to remedy the situation if shame had not already done so.

TRIGGERS

Smells, tastes, tunes, they all are triggers to our memory, immediately bringing back snapshots of yesteryear. Neighbors in the rural community where I was born had immigrated from Holland. Their family farm had grapevines near the garden. And in the era before canned soft drinks, grape juice was offered to guests. Mrs. Wissink died when I was quite small, I have no memory of her. But the taste of grape juice remains in my memory bank. One sip and I think of that family and say a silent prayer for them and realise how fortunate my family was to have such good neighbors and friends.

STUFF

Bittersweet thoughts accompany the dust cloth. Our home is filled with "bit & pieces", each with a story, a memory, a link to a loved one in our past. Dusting is not a chore, it is a stroll down Memory Lane. As we age, those memories become even more precious. There is no rush to finish and move on to other activities. Each moment can be savored like a sweet piece of candy, and a we say a prayer for those who have gone on ahead. R.I.P.

Accepting

Yesterday is history
Tomorrow a mystery
Today is a gift
That's why it's called the present

Former days

We were raised in a small town. It was an innocent time. Most Mothers worked only at home, so every house was a haven, in case of emergency. And they also contained a monitor, who would not hesitate to correct a misbehaving child. But freedom was enjoyed, to walk, ride bikes, play games or just sit in the shade. Fresh air and sunshine were the order of the day. Chores? of course we had chores! Rainy days were spent inside, playing card games, reading a book, or baking cookies. No TV or computer, but a swing in the back yard or at the school playground. Shopping (really wishing) was done holding a catalog. NO allowances. What did we need money for? And if you were taken in to a store, you were told to NOT touch anything (and didn't!). Siblings shared rooms, closets and dresser drawers. Younger children wore hand me downs, so new items were really appreciated.

Not a better or worse life-just different. Seemed to be just as much happiness and smiles. Did we know about stress? Imagine the same ratio of dysfunctional people, does that ever change?

Small world

Our neighbor's son and his wife came from Florida. He had just spent a week here with his parents, now only his Mother is here. We got to meet his lovely wife. She is a sister to a man in Cheyenne, who I have known for several years. And we smiled at the coincidence.

Life is full of quirky things, reminding us to be kind to everyone who crosses our path. They are someone's brother, sister, parent, or child. Regardless of their race, religion, opinions, hair style, or manner of dress, each is God's child and deserves our tolerance. Why do we accept those we know, but question the strangers? How do others view and judge us? Perhaps, pondering on that might temper our responses.

Learning

Something new each and every day.
Will we ever catch up?
Techonolgy changes in the blink of an eye.
Is it all necessary? Or just a flash in the pan?
Does it make our jobs easier? Or just fill up our days?
Becomes a challange to sort it all out and try to put in perspective.
Balance, moderation in all things, HMMMM.
Something to ponder....

R.I.P.

A neighbor and friend died Saturday evening. Finally at ease after several years of declining health. Leaving a wife of nearly 61 years and 3 children. "Someday" is no longer an option.

Every death reminds us how fleeting our time on earth is. Every death brings our thoughts to those we love who have gone on ahead, as well as those, who are currently struggling to hold onto their life, and those, who are young and healthy and may be gone in the blink of an eye. Death is indiscriminate, it follws no set path.

Time to "clean house"! In our hearts, minds, and our physical surroundings. The darkness of Saturday evening was followed by the bright sun the next morning. And Monday brought a layer of fresh snow, presenting the World as a fresh white canvas to begin a new painting of the future. Each day a new beginning, hopefully we will use it wisely, learning from the mistakes of our past. Not someday-

Today!

SOME DAY

some day - It never comes.

There is only today, only this moment.

Today-----

say "I love you"

do a good deed

visit a friend

spend time with a loved one

use the good dishes

sit in the sun and relax

write a note

take a trip

read a book to a child

hug your family

prepare your will

get your affairs in order

take a walk and see your world

forgive and forget

give (anonomously)

smile at a stranger

Make a deliberate effort NEVER to say "Some day I will..."

Do it today!

Why don' they?

Blood pressure to high. Hmmm. Lose weight, walk each day, lessen stress if possible. Make sure to get enough sleep. Seriously examine diet choices. perhaps cut back on the use of the salt shaker. Sounds like common sense to me. Seems most walk away from doctor's office with a prescription for medication and no advice about life style changes, or warnings about the side effects of the medication. And aren't medications expensive? Hmmm.

Diet and budget

Food that is good for you is not cheap. But it is less expensive per pound than most poor choices at the grocery store. If I don't buy potato chips and bring them home, they aren't on the shelf to temp us. Fresh fruit and veggies may be pricey-but figure our cost per pound for the chips! We seldom bake cookies or cakes. Try to keep lots of salad ingredients in the fridge. Almonds, cashews, peanuts are better snack foods. PEPSI, COKE, etc. -- cold water tastes just as good, with less calories, and sure is cheaper. Most of all, good choices at the grocery store end up being much cheaper that appointments at the doctor's office and getting prescriptions filled. Common sense?

Clear the clutter

The current hot subject for publishing is "clutter" and organization. I have always been organized. That is because I am basically lazy. It is less work that way. Do it once, do it correctly, and get on to more fun projects. Make lists and set priorities. Write it down, figure it out, do it!

Opinions

Of course I have opinions, millions of them. And the older I get the less restrained I am in expressing them. (Was I ever?--don't think so!) And I prefer truth over diplomacy. Socially correct? I could care less. But rudeness is NOT permitted. Menniger wrote WHAT EVER BECAME OF SIN? I'd like to know what became of common sense?